101 in 1001 Monthly Update

1. Make a wreath for my front door - 10/16/11

2. Go to the Texas State Fair - 10/4/10

3. Eat a meal from a food truck

4. Go to the symphony

5. Go 1 week without watching TV - 1/9/11

6. Finally buy wedding pictures...

7. Hang wedding pictures

8. Go to the ballet with Jed - 11/27/10

9. Tour The Sixth Floor Museum The State Capital - 8/7/12

10. Finish my T-shirt quilt I started 2 3 years ago - 3/23/11

11. Go to the Ft. Worth Zoo - 10/2/10

12. Lose 20 pounds!! - 11/3/10

13. Lose 20 more pounds!!! - 6/22/11

14. Go snorkeling again Go to the driving range - 12/30/11

15. Catch up on 30 Rock - 12/6/10

16. Eat vegetarian for a week Try fish - 12/15/11 (tilapia)

17. Go to a Rangers game - 5/13/11

18. Do a ropes course

19. Write in my journal every day for 1 month

20. Go rock climbing again

21. Go back to school - 3/23/11 :)

22. Take a picture each day for 3 1 month - 12/14/11

23. Ride on a real train - 11/19/11

24. Bear my testimony in church - 3/25/12

25. Get my picture taken by a professional

26. Get our family photo taken by a professional

27. Swim 10 continuous laps

28. Get a dog

29. Visit NASA

30. Family prayer and Personal scripture study every day for 1 month - 2/3/11

31. Visit San Antonio during a holiday - 7/4/11

32. Join a choir - 10/10/10

33. Make a sourdough starter - 5/9/11

34. Go white water rafting again

35. Pick up the violin again

36. Take Jed to a rodeo - 1/20/11

37. Buy cowboy boots or hats - 11/6/10

38. Get in the car and drive 2 hours in one direction with the windows down and the radio blasting - 5/25/12

39. Visit all great-grandparents' grave sites (Mom's side) - 6/17/12

40. Go to the Dallas Temple - 2/23/11

41. Take Jed to a jazz bar country concert (Rascal Flatts) - 7/13/12

42. Fly a kite - 3/6/12

43. Go to a haunted house with Jed - 10/25/10

44. Complete Couch to 5K Challenge Ride a mechanical bull - 11/19/11

45. Participate in an organized 5K! - 7/11/11

46. Get my palm read or fortune told

47. Go on another cruise with Jed

48. Help build a Habitat for Humanity house - 12/7/11

49. Make Mom's cinnamon rolls - 10/30/10

50. Make Theresa's cinnamon rolls

51. Go to Schlitterbahn with Jed

52. Buy a homeless person lunch - 3/14/11

53. Have a baby!! - 8/19/12

54. Watch the Zombie Walk - 10/16/10

55. Pay off Jed's car!! - 10/19/10

56. Go fishing with Jed - 5/30/11

57. Be 100% credit card debt-free!!! - 2/6/12

58. Ride a horse - 7/30/11

59. Go to the Dallas Aquarium - 2/10/12

60. Dance to a vinyl record

61. Take a cooking class

62. Get an SLR a video camera - 12/25/11

63. Skydive

64. Visit Gettysburg or Williamsburg

65. Make out in the rain

66. Go to Six Flags with Jed

67. File my own taxes without calling Daddy - 2/22/11

68. Make a hole-in-one

69. Take a hot-air balloon or helicopter ride

70. Change my own oil

71. Go to NYC or San Francisco Lake Powell - (6/10-14/12)

72. Take an art class

73. Jump around in a mosh pit again

74. Go to a circus - 10/14/10

75. Deep clean my bathroom - 2/10/11

76. Visit my sister, Laurel, in California - 4/6/11

77. Ride a motorcycle  Buy a house! - 3/21/12

78. Get a TX driver's license again - 9/29/10

79. Go one week three days without simple carbs - 11/11/11

80. Dance barefoot

81. Get all dressed up and go to a fancy dinner

82. Get on a bike again

83. Buy myself flowers for no reason - 2/12/11

84. Go camping in Texas with Jed - 5/6/11

85. Go camping on a beach

86. Go to the Texas beach Float the river with Jed - 7/3/11

87. Donate blood again

88. Spend a night with the lights off, watching a lightning storm - 11/15/10

89. Go to the Grand Canyon Time Out For Women - 4/13-14/12

90. Have a meaningful conversation with a beggar

91. Paint pottery again

92. Join a bowling or softball league

93. Watch a movie at a drive-in

94. Grow and eat my own vegetables - 12/1/11 (green onions)

95. Sing karaoke again - 11/4/11

96. Take the Riverwalk boat tour - 11/6/10

97. Don't eat out for 1 month 2 weeks

98. Go to the batting cages with Jed - 4/1/11

99. Donate plasma

100. Eat fried green tomatoes - 11/6/10

101. Do 1 correct push-up

Birth Story

It was 8am on Saturday, August 18th and Jed was getting ready to go help a family from church move. I was laying in bed, still trying to wake up fully. Then it happened. A weird feeling. "Jed, I think my water just broke." "Are you sure?" "Yeah, today's the day."

Thankfully I took the advice of a good friend of mine and put a shower curtain between my sheets and mattress a week earlier. Dodged a bullet there. Back to the day. I stood up and the dam broke as I hobbled to the bathroom. Here we go. This is happening.

I called my mom and asked her if she had any big plans for the week, and how soon she could be here. She didn't believe me either. Why would she? I was three weeks away from my due date and we all assumed that I would go late anyway.

I hung out for a little bit and had some more leaking throughout the day, but the contractions never came. So we decided to go for a walk to help kick-start the suckers. We walked around the mall and bought some bedding for our new bed (and to replace the sheets from the morning). Nothing. I swept the house and we hung some pictures in the nursery. Nothing. I watched Teen Mom and did some exercises. Nothing. I laid down and rested for a while. Nothing. I took a shower and tried nipple stimulation. Nothing.

At this point it was about 8pm (yep, I hung out ALL day long with no progress!) and I knew that if I went in to the hospital without contractions they would induce me. So what does any logical person do in such a situation? Send hubby to the drug store to get castor oil and a chocolate milkshake, mix together, and "Bottoms up!" Then my friend called and put a little bug in my ear: if I show up at the hospital without any progress and I'm getting closer to the 24-hours-no-baby mark, they will more than likely take me down to the dreaded OR. And that was NOT in my birth plan! So we decided to head in to the hospital and pray that they give me time to progress without jumping to a C-section.
{Side note: For the most part, midwives say that you can go 24-48 hours after your water breaks without any complications to the baby, as long as you don't have a fever/infection. It's the repeated checking of progress that introduces bacteria and can cause fever/complications. That's what I was trying to avoid by staying home so long.}

I called the hospital and told the nurse what was going on. She told me that I should have come in to the hospital immediately after my water broke. This is why I didn't call them earlier - even my OB had told me that I could wait about 6 hours before heading in. The nurse was shocked that I hadn't come in yet.

We drove to the hospital and arrived around 9:15pm. I was still not having contractions, or even feeling like I was in labor at all. We got admitted and the nurse told me that I was not dilated or effaced at all. Awesome. She said that they would probably have to give my pitocin to get things going and I told her that I really didn't want to go that route if I could help it. She said that my other option was cervidil, but that was just a thinning agent. Oh well, I was much more willing to try that first.

Cervidil in and violent contractions started literally within three minutes. I'm pretty sure it had nothing to do with the cervidil and everything to do with my castor oil milkshake kicking in. The worst part having to unplug all of the monitors and haul that IV stand with me every time I had to go to the bathroom. Oh, and the other worst part was the contractions that were 45 seconds on/45 seconds off that I'd rate a 9 or 10 out of 10. They came on SO fast and strong!

I spent SEVEN HOURS combating those horrific contractions and breathing and swaying and squatting and listening to music and doing everything that I could think of to ease the pain and get comfortable. The nurse came in, checked me, and I thought that for sure I'd be at a 7+ by then. Nope. I was at a THREE! And only 30% effaced. All that time and energy for nothing! So I called it. Even though I was going for as natural a birth as possible, I was not going to spend hours and hours more in agony to maybe progress a cm or two more, and then get told that I had to get a C-section.

Cue epidural. It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought. But then again I wasn't really paying attention - I was just trying to stay still and focus on the contractions that were still plaguing me. Speaking of not paying attention, I didn't even notice when they put in the catheter. Thank goodness!

After the epidural kicked in, I was able to sleep for a few much-needed hours. When I woke up and the nurse checked me, I was at a 10! The epidural and sleep were just what I needed to relax and let my body do what it needed to do without me tensing and slowing down the process.

I pushed for about an hour and twenty minutes, and I elected to use the mirror, which was so interesting! My OB wasn't able to be there and I got stuck with a doctor that I was not fond of (she pretty much completely disregarded anything I requested, like allowing Jed to cut the cord and putting Logan straight to my chest), but we got a beautiful, healthy baby boy out of the deal, so it all worked out.

Logan was born on August 19, 2012. He weighed 6lb 3oz and was 19" long. He was (and still is) the most beautiful miracle I've ever witnessed. I feel incredibly lucky to call him mine.

Honesty Moment

I am scared. Really scared.
I've tried not to think about the fact that this thing growing inside me will soon be on the outside and it'll be up to me to keep it fed, entertained, alive. Because truth is...when I think about it, I have anxiety attacks.

I'm not scared about the actual birth. I know my body was made for this.

The thing is... I'm selfish. I like having all day to do what I want, when I want, how I want, for as long as I want, without anyone telling me otherwise. I also love the fact that I can sleep whenever I want, for as long as I want, and right now I'm getting about 10 hours of sleep each night. I am not ready to give all of that up and be on someone else's schedule.

I am not ready for something to be latched on me 24/7 and literally sucking the life out of me. I'm not ready to be at someone else's beck and call.

What if he's colicky? What if we have trouble breastfeeding and it's really challenging for the both of us? What if I get so impatient with him and I'm so sleep-deprived that I want to abandon him at the local fire department?

I am a planner. Not knowing when he will arrive hasn't bugged me yet because I've still got a few weeks until it's really real. But the other unknowns are wigging me out.